After the birth of our triplets I went through complex medical trauma and almost died. I worked tirelessly and painfully to reach beyond the moments where I felt stuck, the moments I experienced triggers, moments I would want to suppress so I could just feel ‘normal’. A powerful tool in healing is writing letters (though not necessarily actually sending them) to the different “players” in your story. I wrote letters to the doctors, the triplets, myself, anyone who I felt I wanted to share with. I made sure to specify why I was angry and why I was sad. Without the limitation of overthinking, writing brought up things I never realized I felt, never thought I cared about. Writing brought about such clarity, a conscious shift and massive healing.
Last year before Yom Kippur I came across this quote “When you forgive you heal and when you let go you grow” and decided it was time to add an addendum to my letters titled “I forgive you for..” I wanted to be able to move beyond my story while appreciating the growth from my painful experiences.
Yom Kippur is a time to ask for forgiveness from our fellow man as well as from G-D. We read about Jonah and the whale- a piece of history focused on the lessons of forgiveness. Let us go into this Yom Kippur throwing off the chains of grudges that limit us, that hold us back from living our true potential.
P. S. Letter writing is always helpful! When you’re feeling like everything is jumbled; emotions, feelings, decisions, start writing and see what arises – Shevy Vigler
Photo: Vigler triplets circa 3 weeks old